29 May 2012
Dear Mummy and Daddy,
Camp is so strange! There are no towel-warming racks in the bathrooms, and there are open pits with fires burning real wood. We actually see our food being cooked, and are expected to hold raw meat over the flames. I really don’t think this is how Cook does it. I was given something called a “marshmallow”, and it caught fire and everyone laughed at me.
We are expected to exercise each morning with a Personal Trainer, except that we all have to use the same one. This makes it hard for me to stay motivated, especially since it’s obvious the Trainer spends more time sitting at his computer and eating potato chips than working out. His tummy shows under his Geek L8r tee shirt, and it’s pretty gross. Don’t these guys understand mobile? He needs a treadmill like Daddy’s, with the computer built right in.
I brought my water skis and my micronized insect repellent in my Louis Vuittons, but haven’t had a chance to use either. They told me there were bugs, but it seems like they are connected to a “UMW blog system” or something – I haven’t been bitten by anything yet.
This week I stayed inside the big cabin you rented for me (thanks, mummy!) since my iPad screen is too glossy to use in the sun. I made some animated gifs of dancing, since you know I love dancing, and I longed for the camp we used to go to in the Catskills when I was little, the one where that gorgeous guy taught us the Monkey and the Mashed Potato. I chatted with a guy in the class named Scott Lo (it’s so cool – he has a full last name but doesn’t use it), and we might plan a dance in the Rec Room (they call it Second Life) in a few weeks. He asked if I could pick the music, but really, these people really seem to appreciate 80s culture in a way I never could (honestly, The Warriors? gag me with a spoon!), so I think I’ll just dance.
I went to a lecture – can you believe it? The presenter was Michael Wesch, and I’ve seen some of his early films, so I thought it would be fun. He said some really interesting things, like that professors use a thousand points of light just to do PowerPoint. I remembered that awful prof I had last semester who used those slides all full of words. Luckily, my friends and I were able to use our phones to create a project to help children in Haiti during class or it would have been a complete bore. Considering our family’s name is on the building, don’t you think we could do something about that?
Oh, and please send more of my La Roche-Posay sunscreen. They seem to want us to go outside here.